Why don’t they listen Mom?

Sophia’s teacher told me today when I went to pick her up, that Sophia missed out on swimming because she hit a boy. (he also missed swimming)

Sophia said the boy, kicked her a bunch of times, so she finally hit him to make him stop but the teacher only saw the end of it, and she missed out on swimming.
What the actual hell??
She said she felt so sad she was crying really hard and then she felt embarrassed because she cried in front of them all. She feels it was “completely inappropriate as a punishment.” and I agree. They are suppose to lose playtime for offenses, not swim instruction.
So we teach our girls early on that boys (bullies) can do whatever they want and if we girls defend ourselves, we get punished too.

I was so angry I couldn’t even say anything. Why oh why can I only communicate in writing with authority figures. I just freeze up and nod and panic inside and try to get away as fast as I can. I could so easily become a hermit with a little hermit daughter.
This is the same boy S who helped R attack her last year and harasses her all the time for being ‘different and weird.”. Grrrrrrr.

She said on the way home, “Mom, there is a notice on the wall that tells you your rights. It says you are not suppose to tease people for being different.

Why don’t they listen Mom? ” I told her that I really don’t know, maybe they are just not thinking of how it makes you feel. Then I suggested she write the teacher a letter, or we do it together so she can have her say.They completely ignore the Autism and expect her to be a typical kid. She can’t do that, her brain and nervous system are not wired the same. This small incident was devastating to her, and created a massive meltdown on the way home and likely she will grow to not trust her teacher to do what is right in the future.

I may need an advocate to come to the school with me and write everything down for them. Her Doctor yesterday suggested I get one, and this is just confirmation for me.

Déjà vu, my own school days all over again. We may have to teach her some ninja self defense moves but I am sure as hell not telling her not to defend herself. A lack of support personnel is the issue, not my daughter defending her body.

She knows home school is an option, but I won’t force her unless I feel I must. She loves seeing her friends, but her health and well being must come first.